Original post: 7/24/08 at 2:13 AM
The moment you step into a room, I know what to do. I smile, look up at the ceiling, and sink back into the couch, my eyes following you from one side to the next. And when you finally decide to sit down - after talking for hours with people - I'll sit next to you and smile while looking up. You ask me why I'm not saying anything. I tell you that I've seen you talking all night. But I guess it wouldn't hurt to share a few more words. So we talk. Until everyone leaves, us sitting on the couch, throwing more wood into the fireplace. I was cold too.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
A Dull Throb
If I were to see you on the street, would it come back?
Would I remember everything?
Would it just be a dull throbbing against the wall of my head?
I wander around and I listen to the music
Only to see the shadows of time, of you
Slip through the cracks of the wall
Disappearing in the midst of painted concrete
So I keep moving, losing myself...
In you but without you.
Would I remember everything?
Would it just be a dull throbbing against the wall of my head?
I wander around and I listen to the music
Only to see the shadows of time, of you
Slip through the cracks of the wall
Disappearing in the midst of painted concrete
So I keep moving, losing myself...
In you but without you.
Friday, June 11, 2010
And There It Was
Yeah, I know other directors got their cast actual edible gifts and cards (edible cards?). But screw that. This is cheaper and faster. So I started writing this on the Moleskine (so friggin' awesome) that you guys got me:
6/10/10
My first post goes out to the cast of Blueprints for buying me something my frugal self (aka cheap ass) would never buy. I thank you for the hard work you've put into this scene, especially given it was my last quarter. I thank you for doing things that are now probably extremely idiotic in retrospect. Like making Dominic propose to Carrie. Or letting people touch Ronnie. Ew.
I know I'm seen as someone people respect, but truthfully, it's only reciprocal. I respect all ofyou so much because you were so open and trusting - that was what really allowed me to direct freely. I had an amazing time directing you all because I never felt like I was the director; you guys made me part of the scene as well, absorbing me with your words, actions, expressions. It occurred on so many occasions that I often struggled to give you notes. Remember the times when I sat silently after a run-through? Yeah, I had no idea what the hell I was gonna say. You were as much of a director as me - helping me with blocking, giving me insight, and putting up with sitting in a stupid circle at the beginning of each rehearsal to discuss our feelings.
This was an extremely difficult quarter for me in many different ways and it was occasionally difficult to get through a script as complex and close to my heart as this one. I suppose that is a testament to the writer's talent. =). Anyhoo, you guys made it so easy for me and I thank you. Here are my personal shout-outs:
Nam Giao/Alyssa: Thank you never learning what self-induced analgesia was.
Patrick/Pete: Thank you for playing computer games whenever you weren't performing.
Angela/Carrie: Thank you for learning "No Scrubs" by about 9th week.
Apollo/Dominic: Thank you for the great accent in this role.
Tobit/Justin: Thank you for not infecting us with your ADD...wait. What were we talking about again? What the hell was that stain on your shirt, btw?
Alice/Ronnie: Thank you for never growing up. =)
6/10/10
My first post goes out to the cast of Blueprints for buying me something my frugal self (aka cheap ass) would never buy. I thank you for the hard work you've put into this scene, especially given it was my last quarter. I thank you for doing things that are now probably extremely idiotic in retrospect. Like making Dominic propose to Carrie. Or letting people touch Ronnie. Ew.
I know I'm seen as someone people respect, but truthfully, it's only reciprocal. I respect all ofyou so much because you were so open and trusting - that was what really allowed me to direct freely. I had an amazing time directing you all because I never felt like I was the director; you guys made me part of the scene as well, absorbing me with your words, actions, expressions. It occurred on so many occasions that I often struggled to give you notes. Remember the times when I sat silently after a run-through? Yeah, I had no idea what the hell I was gonna say. You were as much of a director as me - helping me with blocking, giving me insight, and putting up with sitting in a stupid circle at the beginning of each rehearsal to discuss our feelings.
This was an extremely difficult quarter for me in many different ways and it was occasionally difficult to get through a script as complex and close to my heart as this one. I suppose that is a testament to the writer's talent. =). Anyhoo, you guys made it so easy for me and I thank you. Here are my personal shout-outs:
Nam Giao/Alyssa: Thank you never learning what self-induced analgesia was.
Patrick/Pete: Thank you for playing computer games whenever you weren't performing.
Angela/Carrie: Thank you for learning "No Scrubs" by about 9th week.
Apollo/Dominic: Thank you for the great accent in this role.
Tobit/Justin: Thank you for not infecting us with your ADD...wait. What were we talking about again? What the hell was that stain on your shirt, btw?
Alice/Ronnie: Thank you for never growing up. =)
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Serenity
Grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change
The courage to change the things that I can
The wisdom to know the difference
Give me the courage to love with an open heart,
An open heart, an open heart, I wanna love with an open heart
With an open heart
The courage to change the things that I can
The wisdom to know the difference
Give me the courage to love with an open heart,
An open heart, an open heart, I wanna love with an open heart
With an open heart
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Test the Faith
I'm not very religious. I was born and raised Buddhist, but I never adhered myself to a religion. Lately, it feels like the issue of Gods and deities has thrust itself to my attention, calling for me, asking for a response. Often, when something confronts me in such a sudden and unexpected manner, I don't know how to respond. I fold up, consider it in the depths of my mind, and formulate a response...which often comes too late.
In my theater group, whenever someone needs a cold read of a priest, I am often called to read the lines. Why? Is it because of my conviction? My commanding voice? My 'Holier than Thou' demeanor? I really don't know. I guess I've just fallen into the role and went on with it without much thought.
But now I find myself wondering, "What do I believe in?" I've always been afraid of religion because I never truly understood it; I didn't understand why people would put all their faith into a higher being. Truthfully, I saw it as a sign of weakness, an easy way to answer difficult questions.
Then I realized something that was true to me. I, of all people, have so much faith. I have absolute faith in people and I put my trust in them. That people are inherently good and will eventually do the right thing. I think it was Evan Shulman, many years ago, who once told me, "I'm a humanist...I believe in humanity." And I began to take that to heart.
Whatever you believe in, believe in it. Wholeheartedly. Believe in God and let yourself be that vessel where you sacrifice yourself for the greater good. Blessed with the ability to help others, whatever allows you to do so, believe in it. Because faith is always there. What form it takes doesn't matter because it's faith, in its purest and most genuine form, that keeps you strong.
In my theater group, whenever someone needs a cold read of a priest, I am often called to read the lines. Why? Is it because of my conviction? My commanding voice? My 'Holier than Thou' demeanor? I really don't know. I guess I've just fallen into the role and went on with it without much thought.
But now I find myself wondering, "What do I believe in?" I've always been afraid of religion because I never truly understood it; I didn't understand why people would put all their faith into a higher being. Truthfully, I saw it as a sign of weakness, an easy way to answer difficult questions.
Then I realized something that was true to me. I, of all people, have so much faith. I have absolute faith in people and I put my trust in them. That people are inherently good and will eventually do the right thing. I think it was Evan Shulman, many years ago, who once told me, "I'm a humanist...I believe in humanity." And I began to take that to heart.
Whatever you believe in, believe in it. Wholeheartedly. Believe in God and let yourself be that vessel where you sacrifice yourself for the greater good. Blessed with the ability to help others, whatever allows you to do so, believe in it. Because faith is always there. What form it takes doesn't matter because it's faith, in its purest and most genuine form, that keeps you strong.
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