Five-Foot Small

I'm only five-foot tall
Five-foot small
People say I belong in a high school hall
"Boy, where your parents at?"
"Fuck you, I'm just at the Century City Mall!"
I'm only five-foot tall
Five-foot small
A Starbucks tall - no grande, no venti
Guess God didn't invent me that way
But what if God were just a bit more generous?
And actually wanted what was best for us?

So what if I were six-foot tall?
Six-foot tall
Wearing a suit and tie that could fit me
Owning my own million-dollar company
Would five-foot midgets bow to me?
Reach for the Cheerios on the fridge
So my kid could have something good to eat
And those heels you wear won't tower
Cause I'd be six-foot tall with six-foot power

Now let's take it further

So what if I were seven-foot tall?
Seven-foot tall
I'd be playing pro basketball
Endorsing Jordans, endorsing myself
Selling my soul to the highest bidder
Until my tree trunks become withers
Ain't no sunshine when they're gone
Just me and my seven-foot brawn

Now what if I were nine-foot tall?
Nine-foot tall
My picture in Ripley's and Guinness
With Yeti, Sasquatch, and Lochness
Legs too tall to pick up my kid
I'd knock down the Cheerios so he could no longer eat
12 inch-heels, your legs will break
But you still manage to run away
I'm nine-foot tall, nine-foot tall
Nine-foot tall in a world too small

Okay, let's say I was a hundred-foot tall
Hundred-foot tall
Call me a freak, a monster, Godzilla
I show you who's the thrilla in Manilla
Eating snow off the Andes like it's Vanilla
As I stomp cities and you all look up
The fires rage on but you all stop
And you all just laugh
Hundred-foot tall, hundred-foot tall
Killin shit cause he got no balls
Hundred-foot tall, hundred-foot tall
Closer to God than most
Is bout the only thing he can boast

So what's the right height for us?
Can't say cause you'll never know
Walkin in someone's shoes
Don't work cause it won't fit
Five-foot small, hundred-foot tall
Man, just walk around like you got some balls